A strange hybrid of Teletubbies and Videodrome in the age of algorithms, "Telebodies" is a techno-somatic multifaceted endeavor. Referring to the evergrowing entanglement of our bodies with epistemic, cybernetic, and kinetic materialities, the book combines an alternative art history focussing on Central Eastern Europe and portrays speculative portraits of cultural producers in the Near Present of automation and disinformation. Written in collaboration with a cloud-based typing assistant with central character syndrome, the text can also be interpreted as an academic novel about the doctoral studies of an overcaffeinated generation with a slight attention deficit syndrome or processed as a speculative script for (im)possible collaborations with the AI or machine-based personalities to come. Lastly, it is also an attempt to write a practice-based final thesis for Fine Arts Doctoral Studies at the Vilnius Academy of Arts.